Lord Acton once wrote, “power corrupts and absolute power corrupts absolutely”.
This rule does not apply to me. I think I would make an excellent absolute monarch, better than Louis XVI, at least as good as the Sun King Louis XIV and probably even better than the saintly philosopher king, Emperor Marcus Aurelius.
I would be a somewhat libertarian monarch. But I would reserve the right to outlaw anything that disgusts me. My first two decrees would be as follows.
1. Henceforth the use of the word awesome is prohibited in my kingdom. Any man, woman, or child who speaks the “a” word or writes the “a” word will have their tongue cut off.
2. The production and/or consumption of light beer will be prohibited in my kingdom, Individuals who violate the prohibition will also have their tongues removed.
If you were the dictator what would you outlaw?
lazy road 
“I think I would make an excellent absolute monarch, better than Louis XVI, at least as good as the Sun King Louis XIV and probably even better than the saintly philosopher king, Emperor Marcus Aurelius.”
Sun King? Philosopher King? Why stop there? How about a god? Now let’s see — Caligula?
As for removing the tongue of people who drink light beer, isn’t it obvious that they couldn’t possibly have one in the first place?
If I were a dictator, I would outlaw dictators who cut out tongues….(said with tougue in cheek..lol.) Very cute essay! Thanks.